Sunday, May 2
May 2 Sun.
"No..." -her
WARNING: DON'T EVER LET LIFE PASS YOU BY.
Hope-
That diminuative, illusive sneaky shmuck of an allegory.
...
Haha. I was finally killed by a single word.
...
*gunshot*
My lips parted slightly, and I felt the warm blood slowly trickle down the corner of my mouth.
My head tilted back, and I raised my eyes to the heavens. The vast crystal azure was suddenly devoured by the crimson blood of the setting sun.
I cursed the sky, as my body - broken and bleeding - kissed the parched, cracked earth.
From the countless wounds that riddled my body, crimson life flowed forth, quenching the land's endless thirst.
I wished to get back up, to stand, to fight. But I had not the strength. I had not the life. I was exhausted. I had collapsed, tired and weary. I wept, I bled, and I loved. Oh, God, did I love. And now...I lay there to die. At last...At long last. An empty shell, to be beaten against the dust from whence I came.
I lay on my stomach, my head tilted to one side, pressed against the ground. Pain's caresses seared my skin like white-hot lashes. I would twitch and softly gasp with every throb of my aching wounds.
"It will be over soon..."
I could feel my heartbeat slowly fading...the tempo of the dance called Life was finally coming to an end. Every breath I drew was short and laboured - as if Death's mouth was already clamped over mine in a lingering kiss.
As I witnessed the majestic sun die over the horizon, spilling her gorgeous crimson blood across the sky...I smiled.
"It's funny how something can be so beautiful...as it is dying."
I closed my eyes. Hot tears burned their way across my face, and dropped onto the earth. I relished the glare of the sun on my tear-stained face...so warm...
"I will die with you, O Sun."
As I felt the end draw near, a shadow settled on my face...shielding my closed eyelids from the light.
I raised my gaze...and there it was - a small figure hovering in midair, against the setting sun.
Hope...
In the form of a small bird.
My only hope.
...
I breathed in deeply. My lungs ached with the sweet, warm air of the impending twilight.
I grit my teeth, as I summoned all of my remaining strength to push myself up. I pulled myself from the earth's embrace...
My wounds burst open with a fresh wave of blood and pain...but I didn't care.
I straightened up best I could, one hand still clutching my side, where the bullet was.
Through half-closed eyes, I gazed at Hope. Still hovering in the air, as if waiting patiently for me...
I took one step forward. Pain exploded in my body, and sent me teetering on the brink of delirium.
*Am I doing the right thing? This is probably just another illussion...another dream...Is it worth more pain and suffering?*
...but I still pressed forward. I took the chance, the risk. I endured the torture...I forgot my own suffering.
I took another step. I was closer now...and it still didn't fly away...
*Oh God...can this be true? Am I finally going to be saved? Loved?*
I took one last step. It was in my reach...I stretched out my arm, and opened my hand against the orange light...I leaned forward, ready to gently close my blood-stained fingers around this beautiful creature...
*I'll be found...I'll be saved...I'll be loved. At last...at long last...*
...
(Is there hope?)
...
"No..."
...
*gunshot*
Time froze in its place.
I swayed slightly. My lips parted.
A steady flow of blood poured from a small hole in my chest.
With a flutter of tiny wings, it flew away from my reach...
Towards the sun...
...
(Not ever?)
...
"No...I...I'm sorry..."
...
I fell to my knees, as the cold twilight engulfed the earth and sky, slowly creeping into my skin.
I could do nothing but watch - through blurry eyes...as the sky darkened with night...
As the sun died...
As the cold hands of eternal winter froze my being...
As my hope...my only hope...flew towards the light...
Taking with it my heart...
...
My brother was asleep on the passenger seat,
The driver was tapping his fingers on the steering wheel,
The radio was playing Dove by Moony,
The people outside were hustling and bustling around...
...
And nobody saw the Cursed Child...
As she dropped her cellphone, lean softly against the car door, and weep silently with so much anguish...
Nobody but the sun...shining through the car window, warming her ebony locks.
...
The sun never heard such silence.
...