Friday, February 20
Feb. 21 Saturday
Biotrip Rocks!
Man, I'm beat. I woke up at four as usual, went back to sleep, and woke up again at six. It was then that I found out that the only movement my body allowed was breathing. My arms ached when I tried to budge them, and I could hardly feel my legs. My whole body was hurting all over. I couldn't move at all. Nice. I'm stuck. The only consolation for me was that at least my arm was around Ally. So I just lay there...wait...this paragraph seems...wrong...Ok, ok. Clarifications. Some of you might get the wrong ideas...
First thing, I'm beat coz' of the Biotrip yesterday and last Thursday. We went to Batangas Bawan at Dive and Trek. The trip was a killer, and the heat was a sadist. I dunno about everyone else, but I felt as if I was baking alive! The facilitators from Lakbay Kalikasan were...well...weird. They were all really tall guys who were from UP. Don't be confused by their names - they're all the same! They're all these 'barok' and 'baduy' guys who loved to make jokes (really corny ones, I'm telling you!), throw sarcastic remarks, kid around, and play practical jokes on everyone they see. The thing is, although they seem like mere jokers, they're really kind, respectful and concerned...and that means a lot coming from me! They can be really serious when they have to be, but generally crazy most of the time...and somehow gay. I dunno why, but they're most probably all gay. They keep telling these subliminal jokes about them 'transforming' at night. Example: "Yang si kuya Ryan na yan...wag kayong maloko sa itsura nyan! Mamayang gabi, abangan nyo...magtatransform siya into Ate Luisa!" Kuya Ryan in particular was really funny. Everytime he sees me, he would look over yonder to some imaginary point behind me, and exclaim: "Grabe! Antangkad nung isang yun, o!" And I would chuckle, look over my shoulder and say: "Saan? Saan yung matangkad?"
Snorkeling was the bomb. Sure, I pretty much fried to a crisp under the cloudless sky and almost got dehydrated because of all the seawater I swallowed, but it was worth it! The water was crystal clear and the corals were so cool! There were so many fish and sea anemones and crabs and other creatures in various shapes and colors. We even spotted almost the whole cast of Finding Nemo! Although at some point, I had a cramp in my right foot and had to multi-task. I held my foot with my left hand, take underwater pictures with the other, snorkel, hold my lifevest in place, and paddle to shore at the same time. When we got out of the water, we were all chatting about what we saw, then started scratching various parts of our skin...turns out, it was the part of the day when polyps (baby jellyfish) were floating around in the water. Nuts. Some people had it worse than me, though. Like Les...she was allergic to the tiny bastards and her stings were bleeding.
After Snorkeling was the grueling Trek. All I can say is...when they say 80-degree terrain, they MEAN 80-degree terrain!!! God! We had to climb this mountain with nothing but a bottle of water and 30-second stops every now and then. It was at that time that I learned one of life's harsh ironies. Everytime someone needed a push or a helping hand, I would instantly help them - but I would be the one to slip and fall. And they ended up getting irritated with me because I should have minded my own business and I could have endangered the safety of the others. I try to help someone, and they end up hating me. Oh well. The story of my life. Anyway, climbing up the terrain nonstop really got to me. And to my Cardio-respiratory sytem too. I thought I was going to have another blackout. With the heat, dust, and lactic acid in my joints, I just put my mind in blank mode and trudged absent-mindedly up the mountain. Weird. I felt like I was dreaming. I couldn't hear myself or feel the ground at all. I was dillussional. At one point, I found myself hugging the earth and shouting: "Ilibing nyo na lang ako dito! Masaya na ako! Nyahahahahaha!!!" Les, being my biotrip buddy partner, just looked down on me and asked: "Buhay ka pa ba Celine?" *Just barely, Les.* I said. But what came out of my mouth was something more of a fit of giggles and plain rambling. When we finally reached the top, and my system was going back to normal, I found myself holding my pounding heart and muttering: "It's going to be alright, heart. Don't worry. We're almost there. Shhhhhhh. Quiet ka lang...Easy, easy..." Everyone just stared. Going down the mountain was hader than climbing up. We all had to 'slide' down the path of jagged rocks. A literal 'landslide'.
After that, was dinner time. We had to cook our own food as an IP group. There was something about the atmosphere, the cool salty air, starry sky, and aftertaste of the fried fish we ate that seemed to make me feel...crazy. Lightheaded. Carefree. I wasn't the only one, though. Myka and Les felt it too. Myka plus Les plus Me plus insanity factor...You know what that meant...INUMAN NA!!! Like drunk lunatics, we cracked joke after joke about our teachers (sir vince in particular) and 'toasted' with plastic cups filled with water and powdered lemonade. Myka was insanely ranting about wanting to be both a camel and a pony and wanting to have an octopus for a brother. That sent my lemonade spraying into the air and Les rolling on the sand. Les said: "Ano yon? Kubang pony?!" We then visualized sir vince rising up from a glowing whirlpool in the water, holding a trident in one hand and a 'mahiwagang kabibe' in the other with the Yakult jingle and Sampaguita song as background music. That sent us all pounding the sand and clutching our stomachs in laughter. After dinner, the facilitators performed for us. Hilarious. And as a last practical joke, they sat down in a circle and told us this story of an old woman named Kuring who used to live there. Kuya Ryan said that there was a landslide that killed her, but her spirit still roamed the place. They wanted to contact Kuring's spirit with us. So we all held hands, and he warned us to stay close together and not to panic if anything happened. He fell into a trance and kept on calling out 'Kuring' over and over in this scary monotonous voice. We were all shaking with fear, thinking it was for real. After a few minutes of incessant 'Kurings', he stopped, paused, and shouted: "HELLO, BILLY! ANTAGAL-TAGAL KO NANG TUMATAWAG, BA'T WALANG SUMASAGOT NG TELEPONO?" Needless to say, we were all laughing as we climbed into our tents.
I could hardly sleep, because there was this dog whose claws were scratching the pavement and making a racket. So at dawn, we had breakfast, interviewed the bangkeros and left. As we were on our way back to school in the bus, the facilitators had one last joke-sharing. They were so 'baduy' that we just had to tell our own jokes to them instead. Man, was that funny. Saying goodbye to them was harder than we thought it would be. This was truly an experience all of us were going to remember for the rest of our lives!
And for the sake of 'baduy' comedy, here are some of the jokes that really got us laughing our heads off:
Us: Bentahan kita ng Helicopter, isang piso lang, pero may problema.
Facilitators: Ano yon?
Us: Yung katawan yung umiikot.
Everyone: *laughing*
Us: Bentahan kita ng high-heels, isang piso lang, pero may problema.
Facilitators: Ano yon?
Us: Sa harap yung takong.
Everyone: *laughing*
Us: Bentahan kita ng kahon ng eye-mo, isang piso lang, pero may problema.
Facilitators: Ano yon?
Us: Roll-on.
Everyone: *laughing*
Us: Ano ang 'mutter'?
Facilitators: Yung parang bumubulong?
Us: Hindi. Yung nilalagay sa 'mread'.
Everyone: *laughing*
Us: Ano ang 'cattle'?
Facilitators: Mga baka? Kalabaw?
Us: Hindi. Tirahan ng 'printeta't printipe'.
Everyone: *laughing our heads off*
And secondly, Ally is my frog-alligator stuffed toy.
Saya talaga ng Biotrip! I'm still suffering the side effects, though...
Icequeen out.